Why I Hate Humans, A Poem by The Mummy

It's not very funny to be a Mummy
in the midst of a global pandemic.
You'd think that years of sitting in the gloom
in this tomb amidst minerals, powders, and jars would have given me room
to craft a solution or something that's rather alchemic.

Alas I have not.

So I guess I'll just rot.

Since these godforsaken humans hoarded all the toilet paper.

By Seth The Mummy

Social Media? No.

Website?? I don’t have any of this new technology.

Look, I’ve sort of been living under (inside of) a rock (many rocks) for quite some time.

I’ve got brains in jars, but that’s it.